Walking In Complete Confidence

There is an area in life that can be a great hindrance to all that we are meant to do… that area is the level of confidence we have. Your confidence matters more than anything else when it comes to success. We fail ourselves when we don’t realize how important developing our confidence truly is. What I am hoping to do here is to explore and get answers to a topic that I feel many of us struggle with.


Having the right kind of confidence can be the “difference maker” when it comes to taking action in your life. So many people are stuck; they have great ideas, they have the skills, but they lack the confidence to achieve what they want. To continue in life lacking confidence, can leave you feeling trapped with no place to go. It can be like not having any dreams and goals at all, for there is no way to obtain them.


There are many things that confidence can do for you. One is that there is an attraction that people with confidence have. People want to be around them, they want to meet them and they want to get to know them. It also opens up a level of credibility… people with confidence appear more trust worthy and others naturally want to help them.


I remember a time when Shirley and I started to look for a house that we could fix up and use for a rental property. It only took us a few banks to realize that they were never going to give us the loan to buy one of these unless we could show the confidence that we knew what we were doing. Once we got our first property it became easy for us to continue buying properties, because we became confident in ourselves and therefore the banks were confident in us. In fact we purchased the farm that we fixed up with no money coming out of our pocket… they gave us all the money we needed to purchase as well as to buy the material to fix it up. It is amazing what a little confidence can get you.


There are several reasons for lack of confidence in a person’s life. For some it is their parents and how they were raised… for others it is the peer pressure received from classmates in school… for others it can be the negative media telling them that there is no chance that they will ever amount to anything, for it’s only the chosen few who succeed.


For myself personally, when I was young I was very shy and lacked confidence. I remember being at home when my parents would have company over, and we as children would hide to not be seen for we were very shy and had no confidence in who we were. We feared any critical comments because they would cut deep, for we had no confidence to protect us. All during my school years and into my dating years I was shy… until I learned the impact of it and how to get over it.


As for you parents out there I have some advice… if you want to do a service for your children, help them to be confident in who they are… for it will help them to grow up healthy and to be achievers in what ever they pursue. Complement them, encourage them, and help them to see themselves as being valuable. Tell them that you love them for just being your child and no matter what they do, you will always love them.


People become shy because they have learned to be shy… they have learned to behave and act in a certain way. There is no truth to the myth that we can be born shy… this is a learned behavior and we need to stop saying “That’s Just The Way I Am”, for it is not true! The truth about shyness is that it is not a state of being and you can act your way out of it when ever you want.


You can empower yourself by developing confidence anytime you want by changing your behavior and overcoming fear. Fear is an emotion that is learned and it is the opposite of confidence. Babies when they come into this world only have two fears and that is of falling and loud noises. They are not afraid of being naked anywhere as we adults are because they haven’t learned to be afraid of this. I have two grandsons who when they were young had no problems running around naked in front of people, but as they are growing older they are learning to change that behavior.


Your confidence will show its self by your actions… that is why I say that you can act your way out of being shy. I was afraid of people for a good part of my life. I used a process to overcome this… first I learned to smile at the people I met… then I started to say hello to the people… and now I have no problem striking up a conversation with anyone at any place. There is now a confidence developed in me that protects me from any negative reaction I might get from others and this has set me free to be who I truly am.


There is one area I would like to caution you on here and that is the area of stepping out without being competent. People can get all pumped up with a message like this and feel that they can do anything showing confidence and that they will be successful. My warning to you is that you need to develop the skills before you can safely step out in confidence. I have seen people open up brand new businesses only to find them closing a month or two later because they had no business skills.

Doing stuff like acting confident, without the skills, can be an absolute disaster. But we have schools and various training to help people get the skills necessary to step out in confidence. This is an important group that I want to speak to here… if you have the skills, don’t let lack of confidence be a destroyer for you. You can change by putting some action in your life today… it starts out with baby steps and ends up with you running in the direction you have always dreamed of. How sweet this can be and I want to be an encouragement for you today to make that step.


With all this I hope you can see a pattern of behavior that might be an issue in your life. I also hope that you can see a process here that will help you to develop the confidence to fully live life as your Creator has intended for you. So many people are trapped with fear and misery… you don’t need to be one of them. In fact you could be the person who can help others to see how to walk in complete confidence.

It is here that I want to say, that you being competent and confident will put you in the seat of becoming virtually unstoppable. This is the perfect ingredient for the perfect storm in your life. There is a whole world out there waiting for you to step out in competence and confidence. Join with me and let your life make the difference!

Don Schaefer

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